The Power in Affirming

The Power in Affirming

Mental health recovery all begins with a decision.  A decision to begin taking care of your mental health and peace of mind.  It can however take a long while to get to the decision to want to start on this journey.  This is by no means an easy task and you are not “healed” overnight.  This is a process that takes time and will require work and maintenance as time goes on.

When I decided to take my mental health seriously, I really did not know what I was in for.  I knew that I was tired of being a mess, I knew that I was tired of the up and down mood swings and feeling like I was out of control all the time.  I knew that I needed to be in control of myself, my body and that was the first step for me.  Knowing that I wanted something different. 

For Years, I was so used to being unstable…….

For years, I was so used to being unstable, that when I finally got into a routine in the early moths of my journey, I felt “funny”.  I had never been stable before and it made me feel strange, I felt like I was a different person.  I wasn’t a different person, it was still me, but I was experiencing a sense of calm and stability that I had never ever really know before.  That was a huge adjustment.  Eventually I began to like it.

As I became more, and more comfortable with my newfound person, and this stable frame of mind, I was able to think more clearly, and rationally and not fly off the handle in 0.2 seconds.  This was amazing, and whatever I needed to keep this feeling, I was going to make sure that I maintained. 

Once I reached a place of stability, I was then able to deal with all the negative things that I and my anxiety had told myself over the years.  Anxiety is a big ass liar.  Oh, it made me second guess my intelligence, my abilities, and it wreaked havoc on my self-image and self-esteem.  Enough was enough. 

I wanted to pull myself out of the pattern of negative thinking………

I wanted to pull myself out of the pattern of negative thinking, and that was one of the many things that I worked on with my therapists help.  What helped me, and is still helping me to this day, is my affirmations.  I speak to myself on a regular basis, but I try to use the kindest words that I can.  I even use my affirmations when I am taking about myself to other people, that’s how much I think they help.  I do have different affirmations for different situations, but my two favorites are “All will be well” which I borrowed from Aunty O, and “I am fucking awesome”, and that’s because well, I am LOL! 

These are the affirmations that I have chosen that are working for me right now, they may change and that is okay.  I think that the moral of the story here is to affirm how powerful, smart, and awesome you are.  You can be all those things despite your diagnosis. 

I created a special workbook called the Affirm and Reflect workbook. This is a free downloadable workbook that includes 5 affirmations, and 5 reflections.  This workbook is designed to get you into the habit of using affirmations and getting more in tune with yourself. To get your free copy, click on the link below.

 bit.ly/affirmreflect

I hope you enjoy!

That’s all for now !

Letter to Little Lady A

My Dearest Little Lady A,

I love you.  I really, really love you. I cannot help but love you when I look at your beautiful face and your bright eyes.  I see your light.  You are filled with such promise, creativity and sweetness.  I see that thing that so many other people saw, that you did not even see. When I look at the picture of you, I feel sad.  Sad because of all of the times I allowed other people to hurt and disappoint you and accept it as if it was okay.  I feel sad for all of the times that I did things to you and did not act as your advocate; when I was more concerned with the opinions and thoughts of others over your feelings.   I apologize for all of the times when our gut tried to show us the way, but instead I chose the opposite.  For all of these things I truly apologize. I’m here now.  I am here, ready to be all of those things that I failed to be over the years for you, for us.  We deserve so much more, and I will see to it that we have all of the things that we truly want, need, and desire.

With All of My Love,

Lady A

Reconnecting with Your Inner Child

I know, the title sounds like such a cliché but when I reconnected with my inner child I gained so much clarity on who I was. What do I mean by this?  Well, once I felt like I had gotten my bipolar and anxiety under control, I still feel like there was a big piece of the puzzle missing. There were, for me so many unanswered questions about myself as a person.  I had heard a podcast and had a few discussions with friends about revisiting your childhood to find some of the answers to your life’s answers. I thought it was a fabulous idea.  I started by recording the things that I did remember about myself when I was young before illness, heartbreak, stress, and all those things came in and altered my personality. I had very little to work with, since my memory isn’t that great (or so I thought). 

I then went to every family member that was around when I was younger, who would have a better recollection of my personality back then.  I recorded all their answers so that I can piece together the puzzle of me and find the answers that I so desperately needed.  Once I received the answers from my family members, I was able to recall more and more from my early years.  I was then able to get a clear picture of what my personality was like.  It was not that much different than what I thought, but I wanted definitive answers so that I could tap back into those qualities and nourish all my likes, and interests.  To me this would be an ultimate act of self – love, and a great way to get back into alignment with myself. 

What I discovered was amazing!   I discovered, that I was always an introvert and very cautious of new people, but once I became comfortable, I could turn into a chatter box, and I was super friendly. I was always creative and observant.   These were just a few of my discoveries.  This was me raw and uncut before bipolar tried to wreck me, and before anxiety lied to me.   

I am so glad that I did this, and more importantly that I had so many people that could provide me with the insights that I was looking for.  I can move on now knowing who I am at the core, and I really can take on anything that comes my way.  I do not feel like there is a giant question mark on my forehead. 

This was such an awesome exercise, and I urge anyone to do this if they have the chance.  This can only help, and it is fun to look at old baby pictures also. 
 

Congratulations, you're stable!

A couple of weeks ago I had my 8-week psychiatry appointment with my doctor.  In the appointment, I was asked the normal questions that I normally get:  How am I feeling? How am I sleeping?, etc., etc.  These are the normal questions that my psychiatrist asks of me.  As we were talking, my doctor said to me that I was stable.  It was like music to my ears.  I felt like I had been presented with a lottery check for $1,000,000.  I had known that I was stable, and my recovery process was going well, but I think hearing the works come from my doctor made it bittersweet.

My journey to stability started over 16 months ago.  It all started with the decision to take my mental illness and the maintenance of my mental illness seriously. I literally had to hit “rick bottom” before I could begin the journey to better care of myself and my mental health.  It took hard work, dedication, and determination to get to the point where I am now.  I would not change a thing.  I am happy, and content for the 1st time in what seems like ages.  I have a new-found sense of self-esteem and confidence that I never knew was possible. 

Stability and recovery for me was a lifestyle change.  It was more than taking a pill and going to see a dr.  I had to of course decide that this was something that I wanted, but I also had to make some changes in my everyday life that would yield in big results.  Those changes were:

1.      Going to therapy on a regular basis

2.      Engaging in activities that I enjoyed

3.      Removing myself from negative people and situations

4.      Taking my medicine on schedule

5.      Sticking on a sleep schedule

6.      Eating a nutritious diet and exercising

7.      Being more kind to myself

As I continue my journey of stability and recovery, I will incorporate more positive activities that will keep me on a positive track and on top of my illness. I love who I am becoming, and I owe it all to my stability and recovery.

Let Michelle Williams Be a Lesson to All

When I learned that singer Michelle Williams had voluntarily checked herself into a mental health facility. I was happy for her for two reasons.  First, in recent weeks we have been hearing stories of celebrities who have lost their battle with mental illness. Her story was the opposite of what we have been seeing in recent weeks.   Second, in my opinion she is so in tune with herself and her needs that she knows when to stop and ask for help.  This was a commendable and courageous act on her part.  This really got me thinking.  I see a lot of posts on social media that promote self-care, and self-love.  But what do those things really look like?  My idea of self-care and self-love will vary greatly from the person next to me. 

Michelle’s story was a reminder to me that the ultimate form of self-love and self-care is getting to know yourself, and your illness so intimately to the point that you know when you must stop, acknowledge that you are not well and get help.  I have said this before and I will say it again, dealing with a mental health disorder is no walk in the park.  However, mental illnesses can be managed with the correct tools and support systems in place.  Let this story be a lesson.  Get to know yourself and your illness so that you can make the best choices for your care.

Building A Support System

The mental health recovery process is a journey full of peaks and valleys.  I know that I have had my fair share of ups and downs on this recovery journey.  When I began this journey, there were so many unanswered questions that I had about this quest that I was about to embark on and what I was going to discover along the way.

The recovery process is not for the faint of heart though.  You must be open minded, willing to learn, and excited for all the changes that are going to happen.  I have learned many lessons along the way, but the most important lesson is the importance of building a support system who will stand behind me during this process.  You cannot deal with your mental health issues alone.  That is not realistic, and you will be setting yourself up for failure if you believe this. For a long time, I used the isolation method. When my symptoms would appear, I would isolate myself and not speak up.  This was the worst thing that I could have done.  It is no good for the person with the illness and it is no good for the people around you who love and care about you.  They will get the wrong idea about you and think that you are uninterested and unreliable.

Building a strong support system when you are in mental health recovery is of the utmost importance to keep yourself on the right track so that you have people who can pick you up when you fall. 

It is totally up to you who you choose to include in your support system.  The main thing is that you trust them and feel comfortable with them when you need their assistance.

My support system includes my therapist, psychiatrist, close friends, and a few family members. 

I have also found support groups for people with mental illnesses have really helped me.  There is something comforting to me about knowing that I am in a group with people who share similar circumstances such as myself. I can discuss my problems, illness, and issues with understanding and without judgement.

That was part of the reason that I created two support groups.  One in person and one online.  The Sanctuary Support Groups were designed for high-functioning professionals who have been diagnosed with a mental health disorder.  The purpose of these groups is to provide a judgement free, open atmosphere where participants can openly discuss the trials and tribulations of managing a mental illness. 

If you are in Northern, NJ and would like more information about the Sanctuary Support Group, please see the link below:

https://spark.adobe.com/page/cXPjyIh4sxiGE/

If you would like more information on the Sanctuary Support Group Online, please click on the link below.

https://spark.adobe.com/page/lt8xUwRIuYXoh/

When you make the decision to embark on the journey of mental health recovery, decide who will be a part of your recovery support system.  Everyone needs one. And remember, you can live your best life despite a mental illness!

You see RBF (Resting Bitch Face), I see Mental Chaos

For years I was approached by strangers, family, and friends asking why I always looked so “mean”. I was always puzzled by this question because time and time again my answer would be the same.  “This is my face.  This is just how I look.”  That was the very abridged answer to their question of course.  I could never ever in a million years give the long and expanded version.  The truth of the matter was that I was not being mean or trying to be anyway.  The truth was this.  My anxiety was having a field day with my mind.  I was so consumed with the thoughts in my head.  I was focused on what people were thinking about me.  What were they saying about me, did I look ok, was my hair and clothes okay, and I wanted to make sure that I had my thoughts fully thought out before I dare uttered a word out loud.  I did not want to appear foolish or stupid to the people around me. 

It really is true, when they say that you can never judge a book by its cover.  When people would see me, they thought resting bitch face.  But what was actually going on was mental chaos.  And lots of it.  My mind was filled with chaos.  My thoughts were like a rollercoaster and my concentration was non-existent. This went on for years before I finally decided to seek treatment.  It was not an easy situation.   

I am, however, grateful that I have had the opportunity to work through my mental chaos, so I am not  consumed by the thoughts and actions of others.  It was literally wreaking on my peace of mind.  That is not a good place to be in when you are managing a mental health disorder.

My Lightbulb Therapy Moment

The wonderful thing about therapy is that when it you take it seriously amazing things can happen.  I am a big supporter of therapy.  Years ago, when I was a lot younger and not so wise I was attracted to the idea, but I never knew why.  Maybe it was my intuition trying to guide me to something that I truly needed but did not quite realize at the time.  I have been to many therapists. I had some good experiences, and some not so good experiences.  In all my years off and on in therapy, I never wrote it off completely. However, timing is everything. 

As I have mentioned in a previous post, I have a great therapist and it was a series of trial and error in getting to the point where I am comfortable in saying that I am beyond satisfied with her.  In my opinion, a good therapist will guide you and lead you on a journey of self-discovery and self-awareness.  You really get to look at yourself.  The good, bad, and downright ugly. 

While I decided to seek out therapy for my mental health issues initially, my journey forced me to look at all my baggage.  My childhood baggage, my teenage baggage, and my adult baggage. Looking at all the things that contributed to the person that I had become was monumental in learning how to deal with my bipolar disorder and anxiety. 

The moral of my story is this:  looking at all my traumas, heartaches, and disappointments of my past have truly allowed me to better understand myself, and how to control my illness and the way I manage it.  It was time to deal with my past hurt head on so that I could do what I must do for myself here and now.

Having a good therapist helps when you want stability

I have just marked an important milestone at the start of this month.  This month marked 1year stable in mental health journey.  This last year has been a great time of learning as well as growth for me.  I am filled with happiness and gratitude that I have been so blessed to get to this point. This was not an easy journey and as I look back on the there were so many instances that could have allowed this story to end up another way. 

At the beginning of this journey year I was not seeing a therapist.  I had been seeing a therapist several months prior who, I decided to stop seeing.  I felt he did not have my best interest in mind.  He was opinionated and forced his opinions on me instead of allowing me to draw my own conclusions and make my own connections.  I felt it in my gut that this was not the “therapist” for me.  I did however see my psychiatrist regularly (every 8 weeks) for prescription maintenance. 

When I finally decided to get serious about my mental health and mental health care routine, I knew that finding a therapist would be paramount to my recovery.  There were several reasons why I had in the past no stuck to the routine of regularly going to therapy.  One of them was cost.  I did not want to make the investment into myself and commit to getting well and learning the coping skills that I needed to maintain a stable lifestyle, and the second reason was that in the past I was very inconsistent.  I would see a therapist for a few months, and then fall off, because I may have felt better or thought that everything that needed to be addressed was already addressed.

This time was different.  I was on a rollercoaster that did not stop, and I was tired of the ride.  I wanted off.  I wanted to bring myself some sense of normalcy.  I wanted most amount of normal that I would be able to get considering my situation.

If you have ever had to find a therapist, it is no easy task.  It is quite grueling.  It is not one of those things where you just call up and schedule an appointment like you would do with let’s say a massage.  I wasn’t just looking for someone with the credentials or the degree, I was looking for a connection.  I wanted a therapist who would be able to connect with me on a deeper level.  A level that they would be able to get through to me and help me understand my illness and many of the past traumas that I had to endure as well.  I did massive research on the providers in my network and as it goes, I would leave a message asking if they were accepting new patients, and if they were doing they have any openings that would fit my work schedule.  I spoke with several candidates over the phone to see if I could get a sense of what their energy would be like in person.  I used other patients reviews as a guide in assisting me with choosing a possible therapist.  Again, this was no easy task.  I also visited the websites of the individual therapists to get a feel of who they were and what their practices were like.

I finally found my therapist after several phone calls and internet searches.  After the 1st session, I knew that I really liked her and that she would be a great big help to me.  I did not know the half of it.  She was more than a great help.  She was not a person that I would just go and see every week and pay a hefty co-pay to.  She became my magnifying glass.   Her skills and techniques allowed me to look at myself and behaviors in a way that I had never looked at them before.  I was more than just another body on a sofa to her.

One of the things that I learned for sure when you decide to take the journey on the road to stability is to find a good therapist.  Good does not necessarily mean the number of degrees or anything like that. When I use the word good, I am talking about someone who feels right for you.  How does this therapist make you feel?  Do you feel comfortable to share your inner most thoughts with them, and, are they equipped and experienced to deal with your diagnoses?  These are two key concerns to keep in mind. 

I can say for sure that when you make the decision to make your mental health a priority, the mental health care team that will be caring for you is very important in the management and care of your illness.

My untreated mental illness made me a toxic person

Receiving the news that you have a mental illness is probably one of the most shocking bits of news that you will ever receive.  We live in a society that does not openly welcome and support people who are living with and suffering from these illnesses but one that shames and ridicules people who are diagnosed with a mental health disorder.  Often, people suffer in silence and are subject to comments that lack empathy and reflect the ignorant views of society who has no idea how serious mental illness really is. 

As I write this latest blog entry I can proudly say that I am stable.  I am most happy and grateful to be in this position.  This was not always the case.  It took a lot of work and self-reflection to get to this space of stability and contentment. As I sit here, I can now look back at some of my past behaviors and actions and say with some certainty that my illness made me toxic person. 

I was a person who was somewhat irresponsible, angry, combative, controlling and all around a difficult person to be around.  I was suffering, so it meant nothing for those around me to suffer as well. I did not understand what was happening inside of me and why these things were happening.  The reason I felt like this was because I was living in constant fear.  I was afraid to face myself, my illness and do something about.  Admitting that I had an illness would be some sort of admission of weakness or inferiority.  So, I lived this somewhat reckless existence that at times did not consider the way I was treating other people. 

Actively pursuing a treatment plan and working with healthcare professionals that were right for me was one of the best gifts that I could have ever given myself.  I had to go through the storm to get to the rain.  I can say, although would not have believed it at the time the dr. diagnosed me, but my illness has been one of my greatest teachers.

Denial was my Modus Operandi

I was in a serious state of denial for years.  That was my modus operandi when it came to coping with and dealing with my mental health issues.  I would just act like it did not exist.  As I am thinking back to many of the situations that I dealt with, that was my major form of coping.  I would just “pretend” that the problem was not there and hope that it would go away.  I was not going to face the problem head on and deal with it. That was too much.  Especially something so sad and serious like a mental illness.  All that I had ever known about mental health and mental illness was so sad and grim.  My perception of people with mental health issues were that they were homeless, and disheveled, and they talked to themselves.

How could I admit to being that?  Then I would admit to being one of them.  I would admit to being “crazy”.  Of course, this sounds very uncompassionate, uncaring, and downright mean.  However, I was basing that off what little information that I had on the subject and the terrible stereotypes that had been perpetuated about people with mental illnesses in our society for years.  My denial was propelled by fear.  I looked at this “diagnosis” not as a medical condition but rather as a personal failure.  This was in large part due to society’s treatment of people with disabilities and those who are “different”.  They are judged so harshly and cruelly because of something that is beyond their control. 

All my wonderful accomplishments would somehow be diminished and overshadowed because I have anxiety or because I have bipolar disorder.  I did not want to be reduced to a label.  I am so much more than a diagnosis.  I am mother, a college graduate, an innovator, and an entrepreneur among other things, who just happens to have bipolar disorder and anxiety and I refuse to let these labels reduce my accomplishments or my personality.  I am much more than that. 

I will say this repeatedly. I can live brilliantly despite my diagnosis.  I am doing it right now.  This does not define me, I am refusing to let it define me any longer.  There is no room in my life for denial or shame.

The price of perfectionism

For as long as I can remember I have been a self-proclaimed “perfectionist”.  For years I thought that this was a great quality to have.  I have always taken pride in the quality of work that I produced no matter what it was for.  I could be volunteering for an event at my son’s school or working on an assignment at work.  No matter what the occasion, my end result had to be in my eyes perfect.  I never looked at this as a negative quality but rather a positive.  My thought was that I will not produce sub-par anything and have my name attached to it.  What I did not realize was my perfectionism was making me anxious and aggravating my mental state.  If things were not perfect, then there was a problem.  It was all or nothing.  If whatever project I was working on was not 100% correct and 100% perfect, I would work myself into a frenzy.  Often, I would be forced to start all over or just give up all together.  The circumstances had to be perfect as well.  I looked for perfection all around me, and when I did not find it, I was a mess.

Over the years, I have had many dreams, goals and desires.  My perfectionism stepped in and caused me to kick my dreams to the curb because the situation was not ideal, or the timing was not right.  What I did not realize was that there would never be a right time to do anything.  You just have to do it.  As I look back at all the times that I allowed my so called need to be perfect in every situation take over, I realize that perfectionism is a mask for fear.   I was afraid.  What if it didn’t work out?  What if no one liked it?  What if I did a bad job?  I would literally talk myself out of every hope and dream that I ever had.  I had no hope, I didn’t trust the process, and I did not trust my own intuition. I sought out approval from people who did not have my vison and hoped they gave me the okay to proceed.  How sad.

There is a big difference with caring about the quality of work that you produce and scaring yourself out of doing everything that you want to do and hiding behind a mask called perfectionism. 

I have come a long way and have learned that there will never be a right time, or a right circumstance.   What I do know is that all you can do is your best.  And usually things will always work themselves out.  The price to pay for perfectionism is an expensive one.  It will take your time, your sanity, and it will rob you of your hopes and dreams if you are not very careful.  

5 Amazing Reasons to Attend A Support Group

Ever since being diagnosed, I have done a lot of research on things that would help me manage my mental health.  Support groups are a great way to manage your mental health in a positive way.  I have attended many support groups and I love all that support groups stand for.  Below are 5 great reasons to attend a support group.

1. Shared Experiences – When you attend a support group, you meet up with people who share similar experiences and circumstances as you.  This allows you to feel comfortable. 
2. Open and honest communication – You can engage in honest communication about your experiences with people who are familiar with what you are going through without the judgement you may face from those who are not in similar circumstances.
3. Sense of community – You feel like you are a part of an exclusive club when you a part of group of peers who share a similar experience.
4. Comparison of resources – Being in a support group is a great way to share tips, resources, and advice on your illness and treatment.
5. Developing and understanding of your situation - When you surround yourself with people who share similar expeiences as you, you are able to look at your situation in a way that you may not have done so in the past.  This gives you a new outlook on your circumstances, and this may be for the better.  

If you are dealing with a mental health issue and are looking for a healthy way to deal with it.  Consider a support group.  It may be just what you need.  

Events

5 Intangible acts of self-love

What is self-love?  It is defined by dictionary.com as a regard for one’s own well-being and happiness.  While this is a great definition of what self-love is, what does it really mean to engage in acts of self-love?  Self-love and self-care have become very popular topics as of late and people are becoming very involved in investing time and energy in their own happiness and well-being.  This got me to thinking.  There are many tangible things that you can give to yourself that would fall under the self-love and self-care categories, but what about the intangibles?  The intangibles are just as important when you are trying to keep your mental health in order.  As I have been on my journey to maintain optimal mental wellness, I have compiled a list of 




5 intangible acts of self-love to incorporate into your life.  I have incorporated these things into my own routine and I have noticed a great shift.

1.Forgiveness for my past mistakes, and for those who have wronged me.

2. Non-judgement of my actions and thoughts.

3. Quiet time to just be.  This allows me time with my thoughts and for my spirit to talk to me.

4. Patience with myself and others, and recognizing that things take time.
5.Celebration of even the smallest wins. 

It is important for me to mention that I while I exercise these qualities on the regular basis, they require work and do not come easily.  I find myself in some situations where it comes easier to exercise and a little bit more challenging in others.  Life has gotten better because of my new practices.  I am very grateful that I found a new way of handling myself with love and care.  I am also excited to see what these new-found actions have in store for me.

The role of gratitude during the recovery journey

As a child, I’d always heard adults and wise older people say to “Be thankful for what you have”.  When I was younger, I never really paid much attention to the jewels that the older people would drop on me.  I never took the time to actually think about what those words really meant.  As I got older, I was engulfed in a haze of anxiety and I was caught up in the symptoms that my bipolar disorder was inflicting on my life.  I was never in a mental state to do any heavy thinking.  Or in a place to really ponder the wisdom that the world offered.  I was trying to stay above water and maintain myself from the happenings of everyday life. 

When I made the conscience decision that I wanted to get serious about my recovery and become stable, I began incorporating several mindful, and wellness practices into my routine. As I began on my journey, I did a lot of reading in the self-help genre.  This helped me so much with the way I viewed myself, and the way that other treated me, and how I treated myself.  Many of the books, and articles that I consumed all shared a common thread.  Throughout many of the readings that I had come across, a large percentage of them all spoke on the power of gratitude.  This was not a new concept to me.  Surely, I knew what gratitude was, but I had not been a person that included giving thanks in my daily routine.  I thought about it and decided that I was going to do something new.  The way that I had been doing things for the last 10 + years had not really been working for me and it was time to do something new. 

When I started giving thanks for all that I had on a daily basis, things started to change for me.  It was almost like everything was coming together.  Not in a shallow, materialistic way but in a personal, happy kind of way.  I was beginning to feel better about myself.  This was something that I had not felt in so many years.  Here were just a few benefits that I noticed as a result of incorporating gratitude into my daily routine:

•          Increased sense of awareness
•          More compassion, for myself and others
•          More kindness
•          Better relationships
•         Better self-image  
•         Increased clarity
•         Sense of calm

While there are several other benefits of incorporating gratitude into your routine, these are the benefits that I have personally noticed.  Practicing gratitude is a great thing and will only enhance your situation.  So, go ahead and give gratitude a try, you will not be disappointed. 

5 Possible Solutions to Combat Overthinking

What is overthinking?  Well, simply put it means to think about something too much.  I can tell you that I have spent so much time and energy thinking and overthinking about topics that would have taken other people 5 minutes to decide on.  There was one point in my life not so long ago when I had to consult 4-5 people in my inner circle to get their opinion on a situation, discuss the problem, rehash what was going on, get their feedback and then decide.  Only to maybe rethink the problem a little more before making a final decision.  I went through that for years.  It was exhausting.  It was stressful and quite honestly, it gave me a headache. 

I exhausted myself, and I am pretty sure that I exhausted my friends and family with the fact that I could never make a solid decision on my own.  I need a consultation on everything from what style I should wear my hair to more serious decisions like should I go back to school.

Since I have been in recovery, I have had the opportunity to explore several subjects and ideas with my therapist as well as self-reflect.  The root of my overthinking was attached to the fact that I was unsure and not confident.  I also did not trust myself and my instincts.  Therefore, I kept overthinking every single decision that I was faced with.  Since I have taken the time to do some excellent work in therapy and taken the time to self-reflect, I have complied a list of 5 possible solutions to combat overthinking.

1. Redirecting – When you find yourself involved in a pattern of overthinking to the point where it is becoming stressful or too much too handle return your thoughts to the present moment.  What are you currently involved in that you can focus on? 

2. Meditation – When your mind becomes to cluttered and overwhelmed with thoughts, meditation is always a good idea.  This is a great way to clear the noise from you mind and rid yourself of all the overwhelm.

3. Pros & Cons – If you find yourself faced with a decision that you need to make, and it is the reason for all the overthinking, making a list of pros and cons may be a way to help you come to a quicker decision.

4. Talking to a Friend – Do you have a trusted friend or family member that you can go to with your dilemma? Talking to someone who can give you an objective opinion is a great way to get to the bottom of your situation and alleviate your stress. 

5. Strengthening Your Intuition – This is one that takes some work but is well worth it.  When you take the time to be still with yourself, you begin to develop your inner GPS. 

I have had the opportunity to utilize all the above solutions to combat overthinking.  They all worked well for me, but as I am becoming more in tune with myself, I gravitate more towards meditation and trusting my own intuition.  All the above methods are great as overthinking can lead to unnecessary stress and worry.  Any remedy that will rid me of stress and worry are fine with me. 

Photo by Kat Smith from Pexels https://www.pexels.com/photo/adult-alone-black-and-white-dark-551588/

Publication Alert!!!!! Publication Alert!!!!!

I am a magazine junkie!  I love physical magazines, and I even love online magazines.  What I love most about magazines is the creativity that it takes to put one together.  Many years ago, I had the opportunity to work for a children’s magazine and I also freelanced for some women’s magazines.  My fascination for magazines run deep.  I am always on the lookout for the next best thing.  For me that is something that is creative as well as informative.  These days, my passion is mental health and demystifying the stigma surrounding mental illness.   When I found Blueprint, I knew I had struck gold.  This is an online and print publication that covers all topics related to mental health.  It was started by students from Cambridge University.  The website contains great articles and stories as well as creative works and beautiful pieces of art.  They tackle subjects such as drug addiction and sexual assault.  This was a breath of fresh air to see such a beautifully produced zine that focuses on a topic that is so near and dear to my heart.  It is worth a visit to the website for a fresh perspective on the issues that face those dealing with mental illness.

https://blueprintzine.com/

Walk in Mental Health Clinics, Are they Necessary?

I read an article online from The Huffington Post about the lack of walk in mental health clinics.   The writer of the article lives in Canada.  A couple of years ago, when the article was written there was really no place for people to go if they were having a mental health crisis in Canada.  This has since changed.  A quick google search revealed there are several walk in mental health clinics in Canada.  This does not seem to be the case here in the United States.  Just thinking back to all of the times that I considered myself to be in the midst of a severe mental crisis, I never had a place that I could go to right away and seek the attention of a mental health professional.  I would have to wait to be “squeezed” in for an appointment and by the time that would happen, my feelings of rage or despair would wane, or I would have already acted on my impulsive and irrational feelings. Something about this picture is just not right. 

Photo by Erkan

When I am physically ill, and have symptoms, I can call my primary care physician for a “sick appointment” and get an appointment rather quickly.  If it is more urgent, I can go to the nearest hospital emergency room and get immediate attention.  This should be the same case when a person is experiencing a mental health emergency, and not just in the event of a person experiencing homicidal or suicidal feelings. Although these are very important situations to be in that require the utmost care and attention as well. 

I can recall several times in the past when I felt like I was at the lowest of my lows, and I reached out to my therapists for help.  I had some therapists who were able to see me the same day, and others who would not be able to see me for a couple of days.  When a person is in the middle of an emotional downward spiral and feel like they are losing total control, the last thing that they want to be told is that they need to wait a day or 2 before they can see a mental health professional.  Hearing this may exacerbate the patient’s condition.  I think that there is an immediate need for walk in mental health clinics.  These facilities need to be readily available just like walk in health clinics.  People are suffering in silence and once these types of services and facilities are readily available, this will be a step in the direction of accepting that mental illness is real and that people do need help for their mental health issues.  

Photo by Erkan  Utu from Pexels https://www.pexels.com/photo/architecture-daylight-door-entrance-239853/

How Art Portrays Mental Illness

I am an art lover.  I get instantly excited when I see an artist tackle a subject so dear to my heart such as mental illness.  While we know that there are so many people dealing with mental health issues, many people still choose to turn a blind eye to this subject.  My love of art passion for shattering the stigma collide in this series that was created by artist Eisen Bernard Bernardo.  The series is called “Keep it Together”.  What is so interesting about this particular series is that he works with paperclips in each piece.  He depicts anxiety, depression, and several others in the series.  It is very interesting his use of the paper clip, and even the reason behind using the paper clip.  Above, is just one of the images from the series which depicts Anxiety.  The complete series can be seen by clicking on the link below.  I love how artists use different mediums to get their point across on such a serious subject matter.  I would love to know what you think about this series?

https://www.behance.net/gallery/59616873/keepittogether