Step Outside of Your Comfort Zone, But How?

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How Many Times have you heard someone say that?  

Just step outside of your comfort zone, and you thought to yourself, that sounds great and all but how do I do that? I can tell you that I have been one of those people who had that very same response.  Gurus and coaches all tell you that stepping outside of your comfort zone is a step in the direction towards “living your best life” ! Another term that sounds great but actually confused the hell out of me when I first heard it.  


As you may or may not know, I have been on my mental health journey, for 2 years now.  

This journey for me has doubled as a self-awareness and self-discovery journey. It has been filled with ups, downs, highs, and lows.  I have learned so much about myself, and this is literally one journey that I would never want to change. It has been life changing. I had to go through a journey of self-awareness to discover what my hopes, dreams and desires.  This allowed me to discover my comfort zone and the area just beyond that region. That area is where all of the magical things would happen, That is what I had heard so many times before and now it was time to start testing this theory out.


I was, for so many years accustomed to doing with friends or family.  

If I wanted to go to an event or restaurant, I would see who I could get to go along with me to make my experience more enjoyable (so I thought) and definitely more comfortable.  It was almost unheard of to go anywhere alone. It was just something that I had never really done. I mean, I would of course go to work alone, but that was about it. I truly let others dictate my flow and my enjoyment.  If I didn’t have a buddy to roll with, I guess I was not going.


About a month ago I heard about a Jean-Michel Basquiat exhibit that was taking place in NYC that I really wanted to see.

 I asked my friends if they wanted to go and of course they agreed. Here was the problem, the show was sold out until the end of the exhibit.  But, I decided on a whim that I was going to get on the waitlist to see if I could get a ticket to the show. I figured that it was a long shot and that it probably was not going to happen.  Well, guess what, it happened! I got a wait list ticket email at 11pm last Thursday night for Friday afternoon. I didn’t realize this until Friday morning but I was in! I was excited and anxious and this was totally out of my comfort zone.  


Needless to say, I had a really great time.  

Once I got to the gallery, the anxiety had subsided.  I learned something about comfort zones on this trip to the city.  When you allow yourself to stay within comfort zones, people can unintentionally control you and your destiny.  So it is so important to be mindful of what it is that you want at all times. It is okay if your wants and dreams change, but the most important thing is that you are in control.  You are in control.


The Power in Affirming

The Power in Affirming

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Mental health recovery all begins with a decision.  A decision to begin taking care of your mental health and peace of mind.  It can however take a long while to get to the decision to want to start on this journey.  This is by no means an easy task and you are not “healed” overnight.  This is a process that takes time and will require work and maintenance as time goes on.

When I decided to take my mental health seriously, I really did not know what I was in for.  I knew that I was tired of being a mess, I knew that I was tired of the up and down mood swings and feeling like I was out of control all the time.  I knew that I needed to be in control of myself, my body and that was the first step for me.  Knowing that I wanted something different. 

For Years, I was so used to being unstable…….

For years, I was so used to being unstable, that when I finally got into a routine in the early moths of my journey, I felt “funny”.  I had never been stable before and it made me feel strange, I felt like I was a different person.  I wasn’t a different person, it was still me, but I was experiencing a sense of calm and stability that I had never ever really know before.  That was a huge adjustment.  Eventually I began to like it.

As I became more, and more comfortable with my newfound person, and this stable frame of mind, I was able to think more clearly, and rationally and not fly off the handle in 0.2 seconds.  This was amazing, and whatever I needed to keep this feeling, I was going to make sure that I maintained. 

Once I reached a place of stability, I was then able to deal with all the negative things that I and my anxiety had told myself over the years.  Anxiety is a big ass liar.  Oh, it made me second guess my intelligence, my abilities, and it wreaked havoc on my self-image and self-esteem.  Enough was enough. 

I wanted to pull myself out of the pattern of negative thinking………

I wanted to pull myself out of the pattern of negative thinking, and that was one of the many things that I worked on with my therapists help.  What helped me, and is still helping me to this day, is my affirmations.  I speak to myself on a regular basis, but I try to use the kindest words that I can.  I even use my affirmations when I am taking about myself to other people, that’s how much I think they help.  I do have different affirmations for different situations, but my two favorites are “All will be well” which I borrowed from Aunty O, and “I am fucking awesome”, and that’s because well, I am LOL! 

These are the affirmations that I have chosen that are working for me right now, they may change and that is okay.  I think that the moral of the story here is to affirm how powerful, smart, and awesome you are.  You can be all those things despite your diagnosis. 

I created a special workbook called the Affirm and Reflect workbook. This is a free downloadable workbook that includes 5 affirmations, and 5 reflections.  This workbook is designed to get you into the habit of using affirmations and getting more in tune with yourself. To get your free copy, click on the link below.

 bit.ly/affirmreflect

I hope you enjoy!

That’s all for now !

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